AUTHOR’S NOTE STRAIGHT FROM HEART

Now I am feel as if I am standing at the top of Mount Everest. It’s something like a dream come true. I wrote a Malayalam novel and titled it ‘Mattoru Meerayay’ (which literally means – As another Meera), years back. I wrote its first sketch long back in 2002 while at college. I shared it with two of my close friends and they encouraged me to publish somewhere. Whole through the years till 2012, I kept trying to find a publishing house. But no one is willing to publish it as I am a new comer. Some people didn’t like its story line. May be they are right. Each publisher has his own norms and he can’t go beneath that. I should accept it. 4 years back in 2010, I prepared a film script with same novel with suitable alterations and presented it to a veteran film director of Malayalam. Though he promised to look forward, nothing happened and I kept waiting. May be because it’s not worth to make a film! Only happiness is that he read it at least once.

I am not sure, if a reader can easily digest the story which is far far away from modern technologies and still looks so old. Yet as a writer, it’s my humble effort to write something new. Perhaps it can bring your old sweet college memories back to life! Only thing I can assure the readers is that, if you are a fan of romantic stories, I guarantee you, you have never read such a story before. I am 100% sure about it.

It might be destiny or something else. Despite trying several times through many methods over years, BODDUNAN – the site with which I started my online journey 2 and a half years back provided me a platform to get my work published. So, I am really grateful to Boddunan and its team. One thing more, all the sketches of these episodes were drawn by our favourite member of Boddunan, Ram Babu whom I address as ‘Painter babu’ of Boddunan. I am extremely grateful to him for giving me sketches as I asked.  

PART 1 – Beginning with a Sunset

“Is it true??? I just can’t believe!” Meera struggled with words. Her eyes told, ‘I can’t believe these words’.

“Yes Meera. I tried several times to tell you. But couldn’t. I had to keep my promise….”

“If so, why did you break the promise today? You should have never done this to me, because you are my dearest friend and I believe you more than anyone else in this world. But you played with my feelings and lied to me several times.”

“Yes I agree. I should have never lied to you. But I had no other alternative. So I just thought, I will reveal the truth someday.”

After a moment or two, Abhilasha asked Meera, “Even if I told you earlier, can it make any difference? Never…Except that your heart will sink again, though you have thousands of puzzles to resolve. Am I not right Meera?”

Meera didn’t reply. Instead she looked towards the deep blue seas. The roaring storms deeply reflected in her eyes. The sun is about to set. Dusk is so beautiful. A lot of people at the shore enjoying the sun set. But Meera’s mind is thrown into the dark shades of deep blue seas. Like the different shades of blue waves, from light red to dark blue and grey, her mind has also started oscillating like a pendulum between different moods of mind.

“Meera, please don’t feel angry with me. I know it well I will definitely see tears in your eyes, hearing this news. Even if you knew it earlier, it only breaks your heart. Do you know how many times I have tried to tell you? But I couldn’t! He is also a dear friend to me. Perhaps he also might have thought, this news should never reach you easily. That may be reason why he begged me not to tell you. Though he never took your name, I believe he really desired that you should never know about it, though he was sure it will reach you today or tomorrow.”

“Anyhow what you did is not right Abhi……” Her eyes were already filled with eyes. “My life is lost!! But I thought, at least he……..” Meera stopped in the middle.

Yes, Meera has retained her power to cry again. It was lost somewhere years ago! So, she is normal right now. Is so?

After a few minutes, she asked Abhilasha questions one after another……It was nothing short of a storm. ”How it happened? What was the problem? Was she mad? If I get her in my hands, I would have taught her a lesson! What was his problem?” She got heated up. She received answers for a few questions while the rest were left unfilled. She felt totally broken down.

“Meera, it’s letting late. Shall we leave?”

“No Abhi, you just leave me alone for a while. I will come after sometime.”

“How can I leave you alone?”

“No problem, I am perfectly all right now. Just need a few moments to be myself. Can you please give it? Don’t worry, I will reach home within half hour and call you. Ok?”

“Ok then. Take care of yourself. Will wait for your call.”

PART 2 – A journey through Past

After calling Abhilasha, she switched off her phone. Now it’s the time to be herself and her annoying thoughts. Thoughts are a part of life, whether necessary or unnecessary, even if one tries to avoid or feels special about them. She opened the door to open terrace and put a chair beneath the full moon and twinkle stars.

‘What could better symbolize a full moon than a romantic mind or happy thoughts?’ But thoughts lost somewhere else…..Wasn’t it purposeful? Definitely yes…..perhaps to escape from truth and reality or to leave everything behind which were not at all meant for ours! A trick of mind to save itself! Anyhow Meera succeeded in that attempt years back. Yet what is that gentle breeze bringing back? Those old memories she intentionally hid in the deepest corridors of mind? Are they really annoying at this moment right now? May be!!! Yet it’s not at all easy for mind to bury everything, particularly if it’s deeply linked to mind’s strongest feeling, that can lucky be experienced only once in life time. Yes, it’s not at all easy for a woman to forget her first love, though deliberately she tries for it. 

PART 3 – New Campus New World

A bright day morning; a girl of 19 years steps to the college steps with some annoying thoughts. She is not ambitious about tomorrow, but a few thoughts of yesterday disturbing her a lot. A village girl brought up in a homely background, where she is too much attached to the family. She didn’t dream about high studies at an engineering college in the heart of the city. Instead she dreamt to find pleasure in the world of dance and music. A brilliant student, yet the wings of her dreams were not so wide. When her dreams got shattered by the pressure of her family seeking admission in one of the leading colleges of the city, she couldn’t resist herself. When her parents dreamt about a good future with a good secure job for their brilliant girl instead of wasting life in the world art, she lost everything.

New atmosphere in a strange world and hostel life surprised Meera a lot. An introvert girl of 17 years couldn’t find a good friend of her character too. Though she tried a lot to find someone near, she faced only insults and funny words from others. She couldn’t find interest in her studies as Mathematics and Electronics looked so difficult for her to digest. She failed in subjects one after the other and two years later her parents realized that it’s not her path. So they called her back though they were still not interested in letting her join what she likes. So Meera too preferred to join a nearby Commerce college to complete graduation, just to earn a degree – as if a strange feeling of cursing oneself.

When she stepped in to the new world, two thoughts hurt her a lot – Lost two years and to give up her real ambition. Yet she comforted herself when her parents allowed her to continue her dance and music classes in a nearby institute, though not serious.

Meera never dreamt that whatever she lost in the past two years, she will get so quickly. She searched for at least one true friend while studying there. But now, like a dream comes true instead of one, she got four good friends with whom she enjoyed her college life to perfection. Yet she didn’t mingle with boys of her class, though they were so co-operative. Once again her heart began to bloom with new set parameters, where she forgot her old dreams and began to find happiness in the world of new friends. She began to think, whatever happened was for good. That’s how the magic world of friends returned her everything. She concentrated in her studies as well.

Gauri – among the four, she was someone special for her. She can’t find the reason why a unique bond formed between these two. Though she out bursts quickly she has a good heart, which Meera liked most. The rest three - Abhilasha, Kavya and Diya too were so close to her heart. When second year exams were about to begin, Meera’s mind got clouded with the ‘parting’ thoughts, an inevitable truth they will definitely face the following year. It happened when she started seeing her senior students seeking autographs and their thoughts and talks about future. Actually she didn’t have any idea in mind how her mind will accept that truth one year later!

But anything can happen in a 1/1000 fraction of seconds. Such a miracle happened in Meera’s life too! It made her forget all those worrying thoughts. She fell in love! A strange feeling, she believed she will never get into……It changed her whole world and concepts about love and life. When love happens in someone’s life who never believes in love and always insults such feelings, it can bring great storms to that person’s life, may even ruin him. It’s not at all easy for them to step backward for what that has already stormed in their life. Yet love can do great wonders and teach them new lessons as well. Meera had already decided in her teens, her life partner will be chosen by her parents and she will happily accept it. But now what happened so quickly??

PART 4 - The New Chapter – The First Love

Who is Hari Krishnan? How he really meant something to her? It’s not that she met Hari for the first time in her life; it has been almost two years in college. But all of a sudden, it became something special – a strange feeling that she never felt in the company of someone else. Yes, now Hari’ presence gives her a strange happiness, a feeling she has never experienced before. Is it that old Hari? Or is it love? She became a friend of Hari through a common friend – Gauri. Everything began with just ‘A Good Morning’ which happened in the middle of their second year….everything!

One day morning, Meera and Gauri were gossiping just before the beginning of class. Suddenly Hari came before them.
“Good Morning Gauri” and he passed by.

Suddenly Meera responded, “It’s too bad Hari. We two are sitting together. But you greeted Gauri only. Why so?”

“Sorry Meera. Now a days I have a habit to greet Gauri everyday morning and say Good Bye in the evening. That’s why I did so, nothing to insult. If so, from today onwards I shall greet you every day. Happy?”

Thus began the usual habit of wishing twice a day. Not only Hari, his friend Ullas too became a friend of Meera and Gauri. Yet, except a ‘good morning’ or ‘good bye’ every day, they very rarely talked! Yet how it happened so suddenly? How did Meera let her heart go? Really strange!

When her mind started showering the anxiety of the parting that’s to follow the following year, a cool breeze though unintentional drew her attention to a new world of feelings she has never experienced before. In the month of April, she started feeling that Hari’s eyes are following her, though she didn’t pay them attention; particularly because he was two years younger to her. But later, did he try to snatch her heart away?? Incidents followed the same manner. But this time not through Gauri, but through Abhilasha!

One day in the first week of May. Meera and Abhilasha were sitting outside the class when Hari called Abhilasha. Though Abhi asked him to come near, he didn’t. Instead he insisted on his stand and called Abhi repeatedly. When Abhi left her, Meera watched a few students of her class playing cricket in front of the classroom. Yet she glanced at them for a moment. She could see Hari’s disturbing face and he was seriously discussing something with Abhi. Abhi was also telling something. After a few moments, Abhi called her.

Though Hari was not at all willing to discuss the matter with Meera, Abhi convinced him. “Let me tell her Hari. Meera won’t tell anyone” and Hari finally agreed.

Abhi walked a few steps along with Meera and reached beneath a tree. “What’s the matter?”

“Meera, it’s something serious. It seems he is in love. He says, for the past few days, he is not getting concentration in studies. Now exams are near. He is a brilliant student. So he is seeking my advice, what to do to get back his lost concentration. “

A thunder flashed through Meera’s mind. Yes, it’s the same thing she was expecting. When Hari started talking to Abhilasha itself, Meera got doubted. Does Abhi know anything about it? Not sure. If so, are they both playing together? Meera just glanced at Hari who was standing far away. She could see the face of a lover in Hari, who is impatiently waiting for a reply. But is it 100% sure, or just my doubt, Meera’s mind got confused.

“Abhi, come with me. I will give its reply” And they returned back to the same place.

Meera smiled and replied, “Abhi told me the matter.”

“Abhi, did you tell her?” Hari looked surprised. “Yes….”, Abhi replied.

“The best way to get rid of those thoughts is to concentrate on some other things. You should try yourself, then only it gets positive effects”, Meera smiled and replied.

“Do you think I haven’t tried it? I tried. But I couldn’t Meera.” Meera’s heart lost a beat. She didn’t expect such an answer. “Please give me a solution. Exams are near”. Meera couldn’t answer for a moment. She regained herself and replied, “How can it be right if you tell so? It’s your problem and you should find its answer.”

“But I couldn’t Meera….”

Meera became speechless. After a moment, she asked, “Who is she?”

“I can’t tell”

“Do we know her?” Abhi asked.

“I think ‘no’”, Hari replied. Hari answering sensibly without touching anywhere, Meera noticed.

“Then what’s the problem?” Meera’s mind became restless for the first time and her mind wanted to know who it was. ‘Is it his trick? No idea’.

“Is it from our class?” Abhi asked.

“Hari will never think so. I believe so. Such a thing has never happened in our class. All girls and boys are good friends here. So I definitely believe, Hari never imagine so”, Meera replied.

Hari should stop everything, if he is thinking to start a relationship with her. That’s the only reason why Meera said so. But she could feel herself her heart is swinging and something really touched her heart, though she determined herself, “I will never let him to catch my mind”. She was not willing to believe Abhi 100% too. ‘Does she know anything …..? Or everything mere my imaginations?  Why did Hari tell both of us? We two are not too near to him. Will someone discuss such a sensible matter to a person whom he knows less?’

Same day afternoon a strange thing happened.

“Ullas, today I made Abhilasha and Meera big fools. They both believed whatever I told”

Meera was standing behind. But she could identify Hari’s voice clearly. She was not patient enough to hear the conversation fully. She burst out, “I heard everything what you told. I heard everything. What have you thought about me? I will tell Abhi everything. Let me see what we can do”

In a flash of seconds she reached near Abhi and explained her everything. Her mouth was open. They both reached Hari and Abhi burst out, “Hari, don’t think that we are just fools. We didn’t ask you to open your mind secrets or tell something. Then was it really needed?”

Meera also supported her. Suddenly Hari changed his tone, “You both will never believe me, even if I show my heart. If I say so to Ullas, does it mean I have not lied to him? Whatever I told was 100% true. Believe it or not…..It’s your decision” Hari deeply looked into Meera’s eyes when he completed and walked away and a cool breeze swept Meera’s mind. Her mind has already started sinking in a magic world she has never travelled before.

Then everything happened within a few days or so. Everything went upside down for Meera. For Meera, her world has changed. She tried to control her mind and scolded herself when her mind fills with thoughts of Hari. But in true sense she was helpless. Till then Meera believed that if one tries truly, mind can be fully kept under control. For the first time she realized that mind is not under the control of everything. When Hari’s thoughts swept her mind, she felt as if it’s a storm or heart attack. It surprised Meera a lot and very soon she realized that if Hari opens her mind before her, she can’t hide it anymore and she will definitely cry in front of him, though aware of its consequences. But she hid it from everyone as she feared a lot. The magic storm swept her mind within two or three weeks without any deny.

But she was not at all willing to show her mind to Hari as she knew it well she can’t face Hari anymore. Also all friends will know about it and she herself can’t assure that she can accept his love and stand against her parents, if needed. She was a shy girl too, who can’t reveal her feelings even to family members or close friends, as she felt that they may think bad about her. Also she was not sure what happens next if the whole class knows about it.

Hari has never expressed his feelings to her. Yet his words often bring great storms to Meera’s mind without any reason, though they talked very little. She knows nothing about Hari, his character or past. He was not at all a close friend too, except those greetings every day. She was well aware that Hari is two years younger to her. Yet Meera couldn’t help herself and it surprised her a lot.

She started understanding the new lessons of love and repented herself, how she used to respond her friends who fall in love with someone. Yes, it’s a strange feeling that can be understood by only those who has experienced it at least once. Someone told is absolutely right – If the magic of love has never happened in your life, you missed one of the most beautiful colours of youth.

In between Meera’s birthday passed by and it was the most beautiful birthday of her life. A strange thing happened on her birthday, which she can never forget in her life.

Her exams were going on when her birthday happened. Whole through the exam days, the students used to gather beneath the blossoming Gulmohar tree and Meera used to restlessly wait in the exam hall for the last bell. On her birthday she was very restless and kept looking at watch repeatedly.

All students of the class gathered beneath the red blossoming tree. But where have Hari and Ullas gone? She gave sweets to friends and they greeted her in return. Only Gauri and Meera left. She was searching for Hari.

“Now I don’t think they will come”, Gauri replied. Gauri could easily pulse Meera’s annoying thoughts.

“Let us wait for them for a little more time”, Meera requested.

After 10 minutes or so, “Let us go Meera. Tomorrow also there are exams. Already it’s 2pm. They won’t come”.

Though unwillingly, they started moving. Meera’s heart was sinking. Her happiness lost all its colours. Suddenly she couldn’t believe her eyes. Ullas and Hari in front of them. She couldn’t hide her happiness.

“What? You haven’t gone yet”, Hari asked unbelieving.

Meera didn’t reply anything. Instead gave both of them sweets.

“Today is my birthday”, She silently replied.

“So that’s the reason. Happy birthday Meera”, Hari replied with a smile.

“Happy birthday”, Ullas too greeted her. They chatted for a while.

“You both leave. We need to go to office. Want to check if degree forms have arrived, for Ullas’ younger brother”, Hari replied.

They greeted her once again and two girls moved from there. As she moved, Meera could feel two eyes glancing at her. But she couldn’t gain enough courage to turn back!!!!

In the evening she was in deep sleep when her younger sister called her, “You have a call”.

Mobile phones were not popular then and people used to communicate through land phones only.
Meera took the phone in a sleepy mode, “Hello”

“Happy birthday”, from the other side

Her sleep was gone hearing the voice, “Hari?” She was indeed surprised. We left just two hours ago.

“Happy birthday Meera”

“Hari??? What happened?” It was for the first time Hari called Meera. Earlier too, she has called him only once early that month to ask for his Walkman, for her brother’s school tour. It was her brother who prompted her a lot though she was not at all interested in calling Hari.

“When I reached home, I had a doubt; did I greet you or not”

“Ya, you have greeted me” Meera answered surprisingly.

“I felt a little confused. That’s why I called you. Anyhow happy birthday once again”

”Thank you”

“What were you doing?”

“I was sleeping”, Meera couldn’t lie, though she was a bit hesitated to tell that she was sleeping.

“Then sorry”

“For what?”

“To disturb your sleep”

“If so I should thank you.”

“For what?”

“To wake me from sleep. I have a lot of study for tomorrow’s exams”

“Ok then, go and sleep”

“No no, I am going to study now”.

Their conversation ended in 5 minutes. But it was enough to keep Meera whole day in the world of dreams. She couldn’t prepare for next day exams also.

PART 5 - Heart damage and its repairing phase

Her heart has already damaged and she started repairing it. At any chance, she was not willing to reveal her thoughts before Hari. Now one more year, I should manage somehow – Meera determined. The first thing she did was kept herself away from Hari’s presence and avoided him. For the next few days, it was nothing less than an examination and she eventually won it when a break happened in the form of exam study leave. She also noticed that Hari is not trying to talk her as before and she felt that it’s the right thing to do right now. If committed she can’t leave him, Meera was well aware of her own character. 

Though she achieved good exam results for the previous year, she was not at all able to concentrate on her studies this study leave. Her mind got drifted with thoughts and dreams and for the first time she understood how love can affect studies. She closed her books and often dreamt many things. Is it an infatuation or real love? She was not sure enough. Her exams ended with mid-June and after 15 days, her third year classes started. By this time, Meera has already restored everything, what she has lost in the last couple of months.

But again an unexpected wave swept Meera’s mind which destroyed her almost completely. It was not love, but her true friendship – The friend she found through Meera. She couldn’t find reasons why Gauri changed a lot? What happened between the two? No idea! But Gauri was seen bursting at Meera without any reason. At first she thought Gauri is showing the freedom of her friendship. But slowly she understood Gauri was going far away from her. She has now started friendship with other two girls of the class and avoided Meera’s presence. In Gauri’s presence very often, Meera felt alone. Meera was not at all a girl who freely gets mingles with others or strangers. Though she wanted to cry in front of Gauri several times, she controlled herself as she felt that her tears may hurt her dearest friend. But she often felt the heart breaking inside giving her a lot of pain. Now Meera has reduced her talks to herself though she didn’t let it know among other members of the group. One incident changed Meera’s mind completely.

Meera and Gauri were standing outside the class. Meera was well aware of the wall built in between them. Was Gauri aware of it? Yet she tried to break it with her conversation.

“Do you know Gauri, Manu told me that day. He says, though all students of our class look enjoying friendship with the rest of class, sincere relations are rare here. When I replied, it’s your mind set that prompts you tell so, he said that I will understand everything in the course of time. We even quarreled for a while when I argued that only sincere friendships exist in our class, particularly our group. Am I not right, Gauri? After all, how can one person make friendship with others if he is not all sincere?”

“No Meera, Manu is right. Only hollow relations exist in our class. No one loves anyone sincerely”, Gauri was in some world of thoughts. It was something new for Meera and she looked surprised. Her heart stopped beating for a moment.

“Ok, I agree. The relationships we see in this class may not be sincere. But, what about we two? Is your love towards me not sincere? Am I not your sincere friend? Can’t you love me sincerely?”

“No Meera, I can’t. I can’t sincerely love you as my true friend”.

The whole world stopped before Meera. Her heart stopped. She felt as if she is dying. Or the whole world around her changing? ‘Gauri is my best friend. I have never loved any friend of my life like Gauri. But she says I am not her sincere friend. What made Gauri think so? Has she not understood till now, how much I liked her and how much dear she is to me? Till now, no communication was needed between us to understand the other person’s mind. But now that invisible thread has broken somewhere.’

As Gauri was in front of her, Meera was not at all willing to cry in front of her. Or she forgot to cry? When she swallowed the tears to herself, she could feel her heart breaking inside. Was it a heart attack? She felt that the whole world around her is sinking in dark. Her eyes are closing. ‘I should sit somewhere. Otherwise I will fall’, she was sure. Suddenly she got hold of a window grid nearby and stood still for a while. She was sweating.

In a few moments, she returned back to normal. Normal? Or is it another phase of her life or a new Meera born? For the first time in life, Meera started feeling that all relations in life are fake. Relations are not at all sincere. It was not all easy for an innocent girl to accept this fact. It’s not easy to move forward in life if we loss belief in love and relations. Meera was well aware of it. She felt that she lost everything in life!

Why did Gauri go far away from me? Is it Hari? It was through Gauri, Hari became a friend of mine. They both were very close. Was Gauri’s mind dreaming about Hari? Was there anything between her and Hari? Gauri has been my shadow always, though Hari communicate everything through Abhi. Has she realized my mental feelings, though I hid it as secret even from her? Is it the reason? Or was she hurt when I hid this secret from her? How can I ask her????? No way!!!

PART 6 – Newly born heart links

It was not at intentional. But Meera was sure she can’t withstand herself if she won’t reveal it to anyone. So she told everything to Abhilasha, who was also near to her. As a good friend, Abhi did everything she can do to bring Meera back to life. She told her idiot stories, behaved as a joker and read her poems to bring a smile on Meera’s face. Though she was not able to recover completely from the shock, Meera recovered very much. But the most surprising fact is that Meera never cried!!!! Now also she was not at all willing to accept relationships. Yet she liked Abhi’s presence and its healing effect more than anything in the world.

“I am maintaining relationship with you only because I get happiness in presence of you. But I won’t ask you ever, that you should love me as your sincere friend. I stopped dreaming about expectations in relationships. I am not expecting it from any relations any more”, When Meera embraced Abhilasha bursting into tears after a month or so, Abhi couldn’t help herself. Abhi found in Meera, a true friend she has been in searching for, since her early childhood. Meera’s innocence and feelings touched Abhi a lot and she also felt like crying.

It was that particular day a unique bond developed in between Meera and Abhi, and she became her soul mate.

Meera revealed before her, her hidden chapters of lost dreams of music and dance. Abhi was very much surprised when she knew she goes to art school. She also told Abhi how she felt bad when was isolated from others while at Engineering college. But she hid the most important chapter of her life in the deep corner of her mind. “What’s the use if I dig a closed chapter of my life in front of Abhi? Will she feel bad about me? Will she feel I and Hari together were fooling her? Actually was Hari really telling about me? Or was it someone else? Who knows! I don’t want to know the truth. It’s better to keep that chapter closed.”

Meera’s eyes searched for Hari. He was in the usual chat of a group of friends, full of enjoyment. ‘Let him enjoy’, she thought in mind, ‘It’s closed!’ 

What happened to Hari in these days? If you are asking Meera, she just forgot him. Though he was able to find space in her heart, it was not bigger than Gauri. Definitely Gauri was important to Meera and for the same reason, when her friendship with Gauri was broken, she forgot everything. It doesn’t mean she talked stopping to Gauri. Yes, everything is usual. They 5 sit together in one row and share their lunch at noon too. But when soul of the group, i.e. Meera’s lively presence was lost, the group was not at all enjoyable as before. Yet they carried it away. But Meera began to get close to Abhi only.

She also happened to know about the rumours spread around Hari and Swathi, though she chose to remain silent in this subject. Nowadays they both are seen together almost all time. Was that girl Swathi? No idea! If it’s the case of Meera, her mind has completely come out of the danger zone and she was sure enough, those waves will never return back to her shore.

But was it true??? Not at all! Those waves were swept away from Meera’s mind shore to come back in double speed and destroy her completely.

PART 7 - The Storm Once again!

“Is it possible to buy mental peace in packets, for say, One rupee Two rupee etc” ….. Meera doesn’t know who has exploded such a wit in the group. Everyone was laughing, except Meera. Her mind swayed away in some thoughts. 

She joined a group of students in the afternoon to have a chat with. Nowadays she keeps busy herself and has already determined that she would also behave the same way as others do, will talk with everyone, for some reason or without any, as she knows it well now, the world and society appreciates those persons only who expresses oneself, may be sincere or not. It’s only about expressions, the hollow truth behind relationships.

The broken friendship with Gauri taught her one of the biggest truths of life. The whole world is behind expressions, not sincerity. Society only accepts those, who never fail to express. She never tried to express her sincerity in relationships. That may be the reason why others failed to understand her. ‘Let me too join the folk’, Meera decided herself. For the same reason, whether she is invited or not, she started making friendship with every one of the class. She started joining hot debates and discussions whether she is interested or not. Just she wanted to prove herself that she is not odd. That’s how she wanted to revenge with the life, the same life which has played dirty games with her.

“People are already spending time in lost peace…….” Meera responded suddenly without thinking twice. It was the ‘restless’ word straight from her heart. Suddenly there was a silence all over and she could feel all eyes drawn towards her. She bit her tongue as if she has done something wrong.

“What’s the matter that you lost your peace of mind Meera?” Meera could easily identify Hari’s voice. Gauri and Ullas were also in the group.

“Nothing”, Meera replied. But Hari was not at all willing to believe it.

“No Meera, You are lying”.

Meera’s face went pale. It has been a long time since Hari has talked to her. Suddenly her mind was pushed to some another world. “Nothing”, she lied.

“I know it well there is some matter that worries you at the right moment. I just want to know about it”. 

“I have nothing to tell you Hari. Just leave me alone. I am just trying to forget everything. Please help”, her face changed its colour. All the friends of the group gathered around her and enquired about the matter, including Gauri and Kavya. But she preferred to keep quiet.

“Just leave us alone. Let me try”, Hari replied.

“No Hari, am not going to tell you anything. It’s my personal matter”. But her mind was asking Hari, ‘Where were you Hari all these days, when I was really in need of your help?’ She could feel a strange feeling of comfort or security in Hari’s presence, she has not experienced in the past one or two months, though her mind had no such intentions. Slowly she could feel sand drifting under her foot and she lost the grip of her mind. Yet she decided to fight. ‘It happened only because of my single wrong word. I can’t forgive myself’, Meera blamed herself. Also, as Gauri is still her dearest friend, she was not at all willing to tell a wrong word about her to someone else, even if it’s Hari, the other person.

Now everyone has left them except Hari and Gauri.

“Please leave me Hari. Otherwise I will cry”.

“I won’t let you go. I have only a few people in this class whom I think dear. I take full freedom in those persons and definitely Meera is one among those. With your knowledge or not, I will definitely bring out the annoying matter from your heart”.  

The words touched Meera a lot and Hari’s presence brought those lost memories and feelings back to life once again, so much unexpected. Though she felt a magic world in Hari’s presence, she tried to avoid it and hurt him.

“Please leave me Hari. I will cry”. She was very much surprised when she felt tears in her eyes. She bended down to hide it from Hari, as she was 100% sure he would read her eyes in a moment or two. Everything happened just unexpected that she couldn’t help herself.  

“No Hari. Whatever you can say, but I won’t”.

“Is it a bet?”

She regained herself with full strength and looked at him. “Definitely”

“Then I bet you will definitely loss.”

“No, you will”.

Suddenly an attender came to the noisy class and asked them to leave. “Teacher is absent, you may leave now”.

Meera stood up as a winner, putting on her bag.

“Meera never even dare to dream that you have won. I will definitely catch you day after tomorrow.”

Meera went out of the class laughing. But she was already smitten by a unique fragrance of love.

CONTINUE READING

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