They need your Undivided Attention
Children demand your attention. It's your bounden duty as a parent, you should yield gladly to their just demand.
Over-scheduled parents.
With the present scenario of daunting economic crisis and the dire necessity of making the ends meet, parents are caught between the domestic and office demands. Naturally they lose track of where their child fits into their lives. Many child psychologists are of the opinion that parents commit blunders in a bid to compensate the lost time with their off springs. They try hard to make the most of what little time they have with their kids. And its here they commit mistakes which have an effect on the children in the long run.
In a bid to over compensate, the parents invariably commit the mistake of 'Pampering' more than the usual dose. This leads to altogether a different kind of problem for the parents. The child may resort to emotional blackmailing.
Communication is the Key.
Many parents including educated are under the wrong impression. verbal communication is the only way a child communicates with its parents. Its anything but truth. A child start6ing from an infant stage can communicate, of course non-verbally
How a child communicates through Different stages.
Birth to 12 months
You have to watch for clues to catch what an infant is willing to convey you.Because the infant cannot tell you with words. It may be a cooing. The secret is talk like baby. If the infant coos, return it with your coo. If a child gurgles, gurgle back. Think that you are conversing with the infant. Make the infant your active partner. Talk with the infant using facial expressions mostly. Don't mind if hey look extreme funny looking expressions.
Take the baby in to your lap, not forgetting to keep a supportive hand behind its head to keep it steady. Bounce the infant gently or rock gently. You can waltz the baby around the room. Take it to the balcony. Of course you should ensure there are no chilly and breezy winds. Show the baby that just perched dove on the rails of the balcony. While pointing out the dove, imitate the dove's voice. All the while take care not to use harsh sounds especially near the baby's ear. Make the baby to see the dove, wherever it moves in the balcony.
Studies say that babies evince a lot of interest in listening high- pitched voices of course with melody. It's at this stage babies respond to melodious music or vocal recitations.
At the same time, observe if the baby is whimpering and turn away from the scene of interest, think that the baby is no more interested. You are supposed to take a clue out of such non- verbal suggestions of an infant. The baby is saying in no uncertain terms that it has had enough of play. Child psychologists say, any attempt to continue the play time beyond this point will result in overwhelming the baby. Wisdom lies in stopping and proceeding towards the baby's cradle and gently putting it back on its bed.
One to Three years
At this stage your toddler will suggest a play, but may not be in a position to put all his requirements in proper words. Here at this stage you should act like a prompter in a stage play. Suggest if he wants you to become the bench in a park. If he nods his head become a cement bench in a park. Then see the glint in his face, when he crawls over you and sits comfortably on your back. Same kind of assistance you can give your toddler in arranging the jigsaw puzzle or arranging the picture blocks one over the other. If you choose to dance around to your favourite lilting melody or swing in an open place, bear in mind that you follow the instructions of your toddler. Never forget that kids feel great to see adults are being dictated. And this is the best way for the elder to peep through the minds of children.
Three to Seven years
At this stage, a child shows the sign of doing everything on its own. Being a responsible parent, you should live up to the aspirations of your child. Remember not to move away from the scenario. It's at t6his stage, the child's imagination runs wildly. All the bed time stories you made the child hear will now take shape and enter the world of your child. One day, he will become the knight in the shining armour and jumps forward to save the princess hijacked by the monster to that lonely and far off island beyond the seven seas. If the child says animatedly some6hing about one of his creations, just don't nod your head, but in between sprinkle a few words related to the subject. This makes the child see in you an ardent listener. And this time is not too early to take your kid to a park nearby or to a museum on rails that just arrived in to your place.
Seven to twelve years
This is the stage when your kid shows lot of interest in sharing his acquired knowledge with you. If he comes with a C.D of her new favourite singer, hear it. Show your appreciation towards her sense of taste and add how there are similarities of tastes between yours and his. Never forget that you should be open, not judgmental. While interacting with kids, forget all about your loves and choices. Ensure to dance to your child's tunes. This builds a sturdy trust between the child and the parent. When your child comes up with a point of its view, uphold it. Don't try to amend it. Any attempt to amend will spoil the show. The point here is, the parent should not expect always the views of the kid are upto his liking.
How to know when your kid demands your attention.
Kid deliberately disobeys
All the kid's attention revolves around, 'To turn your attention towards it'. T get to this the kid does all possible things. It yells, stamps its feet loudly. The parent without any delay turn to the kid and make the kid feel that you are there to care.
Kid cries incessantly
This is a clear cut indication that the child is feeling a kind of insecurity. Antidote for such behaviour lies in giving your undivided attention to the child. Undivided attention is not just uttering a few soothing words from the kitchen or while reading the headlines of your news paper. Coming close to the kid and with a touch, all what your kid wants from you.
Kid displays its anger in many ways
Another way of a kid to express its resentment is pulls its hairs. Also screams and shrieks to name a few. What all a parent should do at this type of situation is, to sit before the agitated kid and allow its discontentment to show off in all its fullness. The parent has to exercise utmost patience. And the results are there for you to see.
Kid cannot accept a change
Kids generally oppose any change in their set pattern. Moving away from the well familiar home atmosphere to a strange environs of a school is an example. Any transition will be opposed by the kid. The child simply cannot cope up with the changes. Here is where the parent's undivided attention comes handy. Its a slow process, but works perfectly. Of course Pre -Schooling is a good option for the child to get acclimatized to the changes.
Floor Time to the rescue.
Floor time is being with your kids at least for 30 minutes a day. During this process parents generally sit on the floor along with the kids and take part in different activities.
Your attention is the key
FloorTime is all about a parent's attention to their kid for some period every day. It won't be fair to utilize this time to teach mathematics to the kid. It should be utilized to create a congenial atmosphere that paves a way to all those qualities which embellish the parent- child relationship in the long run.
Let your child take the charge
During Floor Time, allow the child to dictate the terms. For example, let the child select a game of his liking. Let him direct all the necessary aspects to be taken care during the game. Parent should participate actively under the kid's supervision and direction.
Floor Time is the stage to unravel a child's interior traits
Floor Time ,properly implemented with religious regularity exposes a plethora of hidden traits of a child. Stress on involvement with your child for a fixed time regularly though for a little time. During the Floor Time leave behind all those office files, news papers, cell phones and musical gadgets.
If you have more than one child
Set your Floor Time according to the available times of the kids. While your Kindergartner is in school, play the FloorTime with your pre-schooler. If you area a busy bee, let your better half take charge.
The overall aim and objective is to give your undivided attention to your klids.
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