Five people who shud be VJ on MTV


1. Tanaaz....what an accent..Disaaaapear...Disaapppppeaaar

2. Varun Gandhi....the agrressive..shud host Wassup..soonly it will bcum sansani..

3. Virender sehwag....atleast who can be funny dan HoeZaay.

4. Salman khan....appppppp Dyeeekkrahhuuuuueee haaauuui Waaasssssaauup.

5. Osama bin laden..full on exp..has hosted many videos..

Five ways to star a conversation in an office !!

.
1) Surprising look :- Hey, Ria. Remember me? We used to go for swimming together in our childhood
.
2) Exchanging or giving boring looks, especially when you are in a meeting.
.
3) Making different face and hand gestures. P.S:- Do read THE ILLEGAL GESTURES first.
.
4) Whistle or blow horn to catch the attention and get ready to be in deep shit
.
5) Last but not least, Use your brains. Bhagwaan ne MOUTH diya hia, uska istemaal karoo. Nahi to khood ka banaya hua Phone use karoo, bill office waalon ka hi aayega

5 FUNNY ONE LINERS..

1) I lost my phone number....can I have yours??

2) Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again?

3) Hello!!! Handsome Lady

4) I am VEG, but I think NON-VEG 

5) lets make babies!!

Five things one should avoin say/ask-ing to gals



1. I enjoyed this period. wat abt yu?????/
2. Kaun sa maheena chal raha hai????//
3. Bachche kinne achche se hote hai na!!
4. Mujhe pata hai isne kuch ni padha. Mai jab soya tha to meri sath hi to soi tho ye..
5. ranbeer kapoor tumhare bhai jaisa hai

PS: No offence, really.

5 things not to say while driving car with fellow passengers

1. Break right wala hai ya left wala?
2. Terepaas licence to haina ? mai bhool gaya
3. Gadi mast hai.. Kiski hai ye gadi ?
4. Gadi ki dikki me laash hai
5. Mujhe neend aa rahi hai

5 occasions for a girl to wear a mini

1)To College on Practical Viva finals
2)To office during the Hike rating period.
3)When your friend invites you to accompany her and her charming BF to a movie.
4)on a day when a guy along with his parents come to your house to see you.
5)to your frns wedding wen rest of your frns come in saree.

5 C'mon Dialogues Durin Engg Submissions

1)Ye bhi chaapna hai kya...??

2)Iska Bhi Print out lena hai kya...??

3)Tujhe Patil Sir ki Sign aati hai kya...??

4)Jo samjh mein aa raha hai vo likh...Jo word samjh mein nahi aa raha uski Drwaing Nikaal...
5)Internals mein KT nahi dena mangta hai yaar..

Five funny but most common habits

1) Nail biting. Err, na na Arjit, sharma mat ab. Hota hai
.
2) Picking your nose. Oyee, abhinav tu kyun chonk gaya?
.
3) Littering. Naam na hi lun kissi to hi behtar hia
.
4) Itching. Anubhaw hota hia yaar. Waise DEO use kiya kar
.
5) Gossips. Girls, ab main aur kya kahun?

FANTASTIC 5'SSSSSSSS

MUST READ DON'T DO'S
1.Rubbing your head, thinking it will arouse you sexually somehow.

2.Use Internet acronyms in everyday language

“Like OMG, I LOL'd when I read that.”

3.Consuming radioactive isotopes.LOL

4.Making fun of the Mafia

5.Being Republican first

TOO COOL!!!

5 Excuses When you dont want to go to school but still your mom insists you to do so...

1.Mumma,Mere pet me zoron se dard ho raha hai...

2.Mumma,teacher has told that today is a holiday on the ocassion of our principal's birthday.

3.Mere auto waale ki aaj shaadi hai isliye wo mujhe aaj school nahi le jayega.

4.Maine aaj news me dekha hai ki laden uncle humare school pe aeroplane girane wale hai.

5.Mere College me aaj Sex education ki special class hai...

5 things students say a day before examinations

1) syllabus kyaa hai???

2) tera ho gaya kyaa???/ tera kitna huaa??

3) yeh question toh kabhi aa hi nahi saktaa

4) kal subah 4 baje uth ke padungi...Zzzzzzzzz

5) kyaa??? 8 baj gaye?? hey bhagwaan mera toh kuch hua hi nahi...naiyaa paar laga dena bhagguuu.. 5 rs ka prasaaad chadaungi...

Five things to do when you won a lottery !!

.
1) Give it back just because you believe in Earning money. PS:- Ullu kahin ka
.
2) Stop working. Ab itne paise aa gayee hian, aish kar be.
.
3) Make a film, and sing me as a hero in lead role 
.
4) Pay a contract killer to kill KRK
.
5) Forget above points and transfer all the money in my account

5 Ways To Ditch your girlfriend...


1.Throw Her in the swimming pool.Dhadaam.........

2.Uske muh pe mooli k parathe khaane k baad paad do.

3.Uske baap ko Phone karke dhamkate raho.

4.Uski bhai ki muh aur taange tod do.

5.Uske birthday par use ramgopal verma ki aag ka dvd gift karo....

Five things You should Carry on going POTTY in a JUNGLE

1:- Paani "water" (kahin pyaas lag gayi to )

2:- Danda "stick" (jungle main SHER aa gaya to )

3:- News paper (poochne ke liye)

4:- Torch (Kahin Der Ho gayi ya Raat ho gayi to )

5:- Map or navigator mobile (Agar aao Jungle main kho Gaye to Don't say" mujhe is jungle se bachaaoooo" koi nahi aayega ... use your map or navigator )

5 Reasons Why Gals usually dun wanna marry a Army Officer :

1) Bed pe bhi hamesha Border pe hi soyega..

2)Bed pe bhi hamesha Attention Attention karta rahega..Aur Kuch nahi...

3)Cz Merchant Navy K Officers ki salary zyaada hoti hai..

4)World war hogi tabhi "Shoot" karega..Usse pehle nahi...

5)Cz 4 mnthz Patni se door rahega army peeps k saath toh Gay banne ki Probabilty increase ho jaayegi..

let's stick to basics.

five things EVERY morning you should do:

1) wash your face.
2) do brush.
3) go to toilet.
4) take bath.
5) take breakfast.

P.S.: in today's fast life, we forgot the basic things. follow it & stay healthy.


Like it on Facebook, Tweet it or share this article on other bookmarking websites.

No comments