All of us care about how we look to an extent, If there is some remotely shiny object lying close to you, you make a quick check. Scan through your eyes, nose, mouth, teeth, cheeks, odd spots or makeup errors. We're women, it's what we do. We are concerned about how we look, want to create a good impression on the people we meet, impress the guy we like etc. After all, who we are is determined by how we look.


Get Real!

Nowadays social media, magazines, billboards all project a perfect size zero figure as the ideal one. Did you know that most of the pictures on television, movies or magazine covers and posters aren't even real? A model for a magazine cover goes through hours of professional hair and make-up, has professional stylists, top photographers who know her "best side," professional lighting, and that’s all before the chosen photo goes to a company where they remove stray hairs, wrinkles, blemishes and "extra" curves. Sometimes one models' head is even photo shopped onto another models’ body. What you see is totally made up!If you compare yourself to those images, you will always end up feeling bad. Stop looking at fashion magazines if they bring up bad feelings and only surround yourself with positive, realistic images.

You're Not your flaws!

We all whine and moan about the small flaws we have. I hate my thighs, my hair and a lot of other things. We can't seem to stop criticizing ourselves. If I was asked to make a list of all my physical flaws it would go on for a while. The world sees us a complete person and not as a sum of our parts, So we should all stop scrutinising every inch of our bodies through a magnifying glass. Besides its not like men notice much, they're simple visual creatures. The guy you're dating or your husband mostly just notice the good attributes you have or your endowments. 

People are more likely to remember or like you due to your great personality or quick wit. Build on qualities that'll stay with you and help build you as a person, instead on focusing on external appearances that fade away in time. Indulge in activities that allow you to be silly without worrying about your looks. Don’t let your weight or shape keep you from activities that you enjoy. Water theme parks are a perfect solution! I personally recommend it ! The more dirtier and unkempt you look, the more you'll enjoy yourself ! 

Stop envying perfect women!

There are a lot of women we envy, those that are born gorgeous. They look like they've walked off a runway model everyday without spending much time on themselves, well endowed and have a toned body and a waist to die for, make an drab piece of clothing look fabulous, and have a great personality!

To envy is ignorance; ie we don't know just by looking at a person if she has flawless skin because she uses a lot of make up, Has a fabulous body because she underwent plastic surgery, has good hair because she styles it for an hour everyday, etc. In short we don't know what she has paid fpr her figure or whats gone into making her look that good. And we try to look like them by plastic surgery we may end up looking far from beautiful! 

Work the positive, Identify your positive traits. Enhance them. If you have fabulous hair with the right cut and a little hair it can work wonders for you. If you have beautiful eyes, highlight them with complimentary colour kajal's. It's there, you just have to find it and focus on whats working for you rather than focusing on the negative.

Embrace the compliments!

Take compliments as they come. Don't doubt them, Don't change the topic or start on a rant of whats wrong with your body. I used to have very low self esteem, Even though i was fairly slim i didn't have any confidence in the way i looked. Hence when people complimented me i would get embarrassed and change the topic. But what we all must realize like i did is that we all are beautiful, so when someone pays you a compliment embrace it, remember it, and use it to boost your thoughts of your appearance. Shut out the annoying voice inside your head that doubts those compliments and keep tearing you down!

 Say something good about yourself everyday morning when you wake up and look at yourself in the mirror, it helps boost positive mental image of your body. Get comfortable with the way you look, If there are people to insult you or pull down your mood with negative or insulting comments, ignore and avoid them in future.

Get a life!

 Just because you think you're a little overweight or don't have the ideal figure doesnt mean you have to go through life worrying ang freting about all the flaws of your body life is passing you by. While your suffering on vaious diets, there are all your favorite food items waiting to be eaten. Depriving yourself of these small good things in life because you're not attractive enough is ridiculous!

That doesn't mean you have to over-indulge! Indulge in moderation. If f moderation is your manta it'll make you a happy woman! Make a playlist of all the feel good songs you have and listen to them when you are down. Read about women who have inspired you inspite of being not so good in the looks department have been incredibly successfull! 

Come together!

Become friends and hang out with women who aren't obsessed with their looks. The others have this fixation because of very less self-worth. There's nothing wrong with wanting to look good as long as there is some moderation. Surround yourself with positive, fun friends who don't make you feel self concious.

But at the end if you still feel like you still have a body image problem do seek professional help, talk about your options and remember that if you're trying to please everyone else, there is no way you'll ever succeed.

 BEST Advice according to the book 'Why Men Lie And Why Women Cry' by Allan and Barbara Pease, a study of 15000 men and women revealed that when choosing long-term partners, me rated an interesting personality over good looks.  

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