How to Control Anger
Why do we get angry?
Anger is also known as short madness. Generally we get angry when things don't work like we want them to work. For some people, anger comes because they know how the other person, related to them, is going to react in a particular situation. They are already angry on that person. And when the person does exactly as they expected, they will blast. Anger also comes when your collagues are just doing timepass instead of working and get promoted before you or are paid more than you. Certain things are in our control, but in some situations, we just can't do anything, especially if the person on whom you angry is elder to you, and you have respect for that person. Their are 1000s of situations like this for which we get angry. But we should learn to control our anger, which comes only through practizce.
How can we control anger?
In the movie "Paa" they have shown a good way to control anger. If you believe in God, you can start chanting the "Gayatri mantra" till your anger cools down. It goes like this - "Om bhur bhuvaswaha, tatsa viturva reniyam, bhargo devasya dhimahi, dhiyo yonah prachodaya".
It's just one line but it works like magic. The best way to cool down anger is to divert your attention. Gayatri mantra helps you to do that.
In "Munna bhai MBBS" they showed that, you have to laugh loudly to relax your tissues. And, as they said, you have to practice it. It's not easy to laugh when you are angry.
Some people say, you should see the mirror when you are angry. You will look very ugly when you are angry. Only when you see yourself at that time, you will realise what you are doing. Sounds funnny but it works.
Some people count from 1 to 10 till their anger cools down completely. You can even spell Silence, slowly, to cool down. Like - S-i-l-e-n-c-e.
Yoga is also good way to control anger. Start taking deep breaths and release slowly.
When I was small, i heard a short story. It goes like this - Their was a man. Everyday after his office completes, he used to climb a small hill near his office, and sit on the top. Then he will remove one of his shoe, start beating it badly on the ground lot of times. After sometime, he would wear that shoe and go back. It was his everyday routine. One day one man eagerly asked. "Why do you beat your shoe everyday?" To this, the man politely replied - " Work is load is too much in my office. Still my wife insists me to come home early. I have sweet little daughter. I cannot remove my anger on the boss, since a family of 5 members (inclucing my parents) is depended on me. I switched my job several times but work load and boss's attitude is same everywhere. A sweet little baby girl is born to me after 7 years of my marriage. My father is a heart patient and can't bear loud sounds. In short, i cannot remove my anger at home also. And i don't want to remove also, since i don't want to disturb my family life. So, its better to beat a non-living shoe who will never complain". He smiled and said - "See you tommorow at same place".
I have no idea whether this story is true or imaginary. But its very meaningful. I will not say its the best method of removing anger, but, what a thought ! ! !
Some people are very aggressive. They feel, only if they remove their anger by shouting on that person, their anger will cool down. Not only that, they even go and tell to 10 other people that i finally had a big fight with so and so person.... That may feel helpful but its not the right way to handle things. It may damage your relations permantly with the person, with whom you had a fight. The life of anger is not more. It's their in you for just a few moments. If you can control yourself in those few moments then things will be much better.
How to overcome when someone else gets angry on you?
The person is angry on you because he/she thinks that you are at a fault, right? So, first thing that you should do is, tell sorry. Then just keep saying ok, ok, cooly to the person, till the person cools down. After the person is ok, you can slowly explain that it was not your fault. But if you don't have time to give explainations and the person is hardly important to you, just say a blant sorry and walk away. Let him/her keep shouting :) Because some people have the habit to remove their frustration at home, on their office staff.
Conclusion:
Meditation seems to be the permenant solution to overcome anger. It should not be done when you are angry. It should be done daily when you start your day. Sit calmly with closed eyes. Try to visualize the picture of God that you worship and try to avoid any thoughts if possible. With practice we can avoid thoughts totally during Meditation.
Meditation will definately help you be a better person :)
This article is totally self-written by my personal experiences. If you found this article useful, please post comments.
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