Why stereotypes are very dangerous
Stereotypes of people exist in the minds of each one of us. There are millions of people who are unique in their own ways, and somehow or the other, "he or she is not like me" opinions or feelings, tend to get accumulated in the minds of people. This leads to stereotypes.
Stereotypes are very dangerous. They do not allow scope for openness, they simply shut out broad mindedness.
It is essential to examine how stereotypes are formed in India, and how we can combat them to the extent possible.
Region-based stereotypes
This is the most common stereotypes. For example, people in the North of India, always think that the people from the South of India, are very "conservative". They think that they so many customs, and are not open-minded.
Just because the North Indians do not much of an exposure about the people of South India, these stereotypes are allowed to be perpetuated. Very unfortunately, some stereotypes have also been perpetuated through Hindi movies for a very long time.
However, since Hyderabad and Chennai have not become huge centers for some of the finest movies, stereotyping is now on the lower side now, at least in the past ten years.
In reality, this stereotype is outright stupid. There are some customs that are part of local cultures and these have religious overtones. For example, there is a custom in Tamil Nadu, to wear what is called "veebuthi" or the holy ash on the forehead.
Just because this is seen, there is absolutely no reason to term such people "conservative". For, this is a hugely personal custom.
Beyond this, the same person, would be very much broad minded in terms of never even asking a single question about the neighbor's personal habits, or about any other personal preferences of any other human being.
This is so common in Chennai, where the apartment culture is as common as it is in Mumbai. The net result is that no one really bothers to even say hello to the neighbor, except on week-ends. People are highly tolerant of each other, and are very broad minded in terms of appreciating and accepting the other people as such.
In fact, the inter-region marriages -- that is, a South Indian boy getting married to a girl from North India -- is so common in Bangalore or Chennai or Hyderabad. The parents are game to this new practice, and nothing is going to stop this either.
Similarly, the South Indians assume that the North Indians are "very dirty" people. Yes, it is true that those from the lower strata of society, who travel from North India, to work in the various places in South India, by long distance trains, do not even talk their bath regularly, or do not maintain some fairly good hygiene practices -- for example, the trains are made very dirty by these people.
However, to paint every North Indian, with the same brush, to say the least, is rubbish. The more educated and refined North Indians have the best of hygiene practices and are very cultured indeed.
We really need to come out of these stereotypes.
Culture-related stereotypes
As mentioned in one of the above paragraphs, there is a stereo-type related to "conservatism" of South Indians, based on cultural practices. It is even more glaring to take religious practices into account, and arrive at the stereotype of conservatism.
Elsewhere in North of India, people also worship God, and have their own religious practices. So, it is very unfair to confuse religious practices with "conservatism".
Similarly, personal habits should also be tolerated. A few years ago, in Chennai, an eighty-years mother of one of my friends said that she would fast on that day, as it was a Friday. A friend from Maharashtra, who happened to visit my friend, was pleasantly surprised and started giving a big lecture, on the "stupidity" of the lady, as she would soon become anemic.
That was an auspicious day, on which old ladies of the earlier generation, as a matter of routine, fast the whole day. The old lady proudly said that she would be fine anyway, and that the person from Maharashtra should mind his own business.
Sensing that the discussion could turn unpleasant, my friend diverted his attention, and drew him away from the house on some pretext or the other. It later transpired that the friend from Maharashtra nursed a stereotype against such old ladies, who unnecessarily take to fasting, based on his understanding and perception.
All these perceptions and the stereotypes that follow, are always unwanted. Such stereotypes when carried in the head, or expressed, only bring unhappiness. One should never allow his or her perception cloud another person's preferences, and this can indeed destroy the very foundation of even very good friendships and relationships.
Such stereotypes can be avoided if we learn to accept cultural norms or culture specific behavior. It is also seen that these stereotypes are almost zero among Army officers or those in similar services. This is possibly because of the huge amount of exposure that they get at every single opportunity, as they get to serve at different locations.
Gender related stereotypes
Boys will be boys. This stupid, atrocious, and outright biased statement was made by Mulayam Singh Yadav, a very senior politician when asked about the increasing incidents of rape in the State of Uttar Pradesh.
This is the popular stereotype of boys and men as well. It is atrocious. Women should be respected and should be allowed to wear any dress, or do whatever they want. They should not be limited in terms of their personal choices.
For example, in Bangalore, women go occasionally to the pub and booze. This is now so common that no one talks about it.
In Mumbai, Pune, Kolkatta, New Delhi and even most parts of Punjab wear sleeveless blouses with saris, or even mini skirts. No one even comments anything about them, or at them. Life goes on, as if it is their personal business.
This is exactly as it should be. What can or should be the provocation to have so many stereotypes against women, is still not understood.
For instance, it is common to find this stereotype of any average Indian woman. They should always obey what the man says, should always respect her in-laws, do all the cooking and maintaining the house and so on.
She should always be dressed in particular ways -- wear glass bangles every day, go the temple, wear only saris, take care of all children, and do all that is necessary to satisfy the sexual needs of the husband. This stereotype is so common in most parts of India.
Why should all this happen? Because these have been sort of accepted as "the way of life".
But happily, women, more so, in urban areas, are highly cultured, educated and are more dashing than ever before. They work in all professions, and are always willing to go the extra mile to make a huge success of their careers.
These women have already broken most stereotypes, which is welcome. Widow remarriages are quite common too.
All these are positive developments.
It is very unfortunate that most stereotypes have been allowed to flourish to India. Only when we break all the stereotypes, will we be able to make progress, as a fully developed nation of very talented and highly tolerant people.
The stereotypes against women, need to broken with all the might that one can gather, at any point in time.
All this is very much possible, if we mentally accept people, as they are. We have no right to question their personal habits, or religious habits and, much less, the way they dress, or lead their lives. Once this done, everything will fall in place.
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