A social worker, from a women’s organization, Mrs. Kamala, was conducting a study on the problems of school girls. As a part of her study, she was visiting girls. As a pert of her study, she was visiting schools and talking to the girls. On one such visit, she had an open and free discussion with the girls about their problem. The dialogue between the social worker and the girls was as flows-

Mrs. Kamala: Girls, there are many ideas and traditions that need to be changed in our society. You all are living in families and have had many sweet and bitter experiences, which you could not understand. Some actions of the elders are not acceptable to you. I would like you to freely discuss with me, so that we can find out how to solve these problems. I assure you that your views will be kept confidential.

Meena: Last week my mother gave birth to a baby sister. She is so cute and sweet and tiny like a doll. I was very happy but my mother was sad. She was weeping. My granny and my aunt did not even bother to visit her. Why did they do this, teacher?

Mrs. Kamala: some elder people think that if a girl is born, is burden on the family because they eventually go to another family through marriage. If a boy is born, hr is considered lucky for the family. So, elderly folks sometimes blame their daughter –in-law for giving birth to a girl.

Kavita: at the age of fourteen, girls in our families are asked to wear purdah. Our activities and movements are also restricted. Boys are free to go where they like. They are not asked to do any work but we have to do all the house work.

Mrs. Kamala: it is sad thing that purdah system is still enforced in many families. Gradually, things are changing. Many girls in purdah are going in for higher education.

Savita and Babita: Teacher, if a boy is not interested in studies but want to purse some other career, parents still insist on his studying without doing any work. Thought we are fond of studies, we are not allowed to study, but asked to fill water, prepare tea. Cook etc. for doing all these things we have to get up often even in the midst of our studies. Boys are sent out play, because they should have exercise, but we are allowed to go to play, only if there is no work in the house. When we ask our mothers, why we are asked to do all this work, in spite of exams, homework and other academic work, our mother says. `You are girls. This is all a girl’s work. When you get married, you will have to do all this work yourselves? That is why I am training you. Boys have to study, get good marks and good jobs.’

Mrs. Kamala: it is true, you have to help your mother in the household work but there should not be any difference between you and your brothers. Both boys and girls should be given nutritious food to develop into healthy men and women.

Savita: teacher, I am happy at home. My parents are broad- minded. We are two sisters and we have one brother. All of us are given enough time to study and play. We all share the work and do whatever work is assigned to us. There is no difference whatsoever between girls and boys in our home. All of us are given freedom equally. We are all free to learn and do what we like; we have only to take care that one person’s activities does not come in the way of the other members of the family.

Mrs. Kamala: I am happy to hear about Savita’s family. If you girls try, you can change the attitude of your elders. If necessary you can discuss with them and express you views, without hutting their feelings.

Mrs. Kamala had a discussion with some boys of the same school regarding their views about the equality of boys and girls.

Some of the boys stated that kitchen work should be done by girls only. They said that they did not know how to cook or even to prepare tea. They felt that these activities were below their dignity. Is a situation arose and their mothers or sisters were not there, they preferred to go to the hotel and eat, rather than doing all this work at home.

Mrs. Kamala: (listening to all the views patiently and reaching) you are not correct; you have to realize that girls are not inferior to you in any way. There is no work that is below one’s dignity. If work is shared, no member of the family is overworked. So the family is happy. Do not let the girls do the same type of work. Respect girls. Give them opportunities to develop and show their abilities.

All the boys: we are glad that you made us realize the abilities of girls. We heartily thank you for discussing freely with us and for making we see the reality.

Mrs. Kamala: thank you all for your cooperation. We have all gained a lot. Now let us act to change the negative attitudes.

• Written by M.Radha .
• In category Social Life.
• 13 years ago.

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