How to be an effective parent?
Parenting is the most fulfilling jobs for any parent. In today's world it is the toughest and full time jobs for parents especially for mothers. Even though you prepare yourself for parenting it always seems to be something missing. The goal of parenting is to teach your child to develop self-discipline Here are some easy ways which will guide you and help you to be more fulfilled as a parent. No one can be perfect in parenting, there will be always some issues that parents has to face and difficult to find the solution. Following points will help you to enhance your parenting skills and will make it easy to deal with your child.
Spent time and show your love
Most of the time both parents are working and ends up spending very minimal time with the child. Most of the time kids prefer to see their parents more often than anything else and prefer to spend quality time with their parents. Most of the kids misbehave because they think their parents will notice them and pay more attention towards them.
Even if you are a working parent, little things you can do like reading story books with them, baking cup cakes or cookies, quick walk at nearby park, or something like this, kids will remember this all the time.
Plan some special night every other week with your kid. Let your kid decide what he want to do, or where he want to go during this special time. Spend maximum time during this 'special night'. If you child is teenager, plan some creative activities that he/she prefers to do.
Connect, communicate, and show genuine interest in your kids life, this is how your kids learn to care and learn for others.
Boost your child's self-esteem
Developing child's self-esteem is parents duty and responsibility. Your tone, action, expression and language are absorbed by your child during toddler stage. Make sure you choose your words and mind your language when you speak with your kids because the words are easily absorbed during such a young age.
Additionally praising your child' accomplishments will make them feel proud and develop confidence in them. However do not over praise your child or never praise for his/her mistakes. The unnecessary praise from parents can make them vulnerable to unavoidable acts. Also letting them do the things independently will make them strong and confident.
Show respect towards your child
We all like to be treated with respect. How would you feel if your relative or any family member disrespects you? You will be unhappy. Similarly your child needs to be treated with respect too. To show this respect you will need to understand the requirement of your child and understand and treat him as an individual. Try to see things from your child's point of view, keep yourself at that position and age and feel the difference.
Maintain Discipline
Maintaining discipline is very essential as it help your kid develop, learn and adopt essential behavior and learn self control. Being in discipline does not mean to be strict with your child. It means to teach them what is right and wrong behavior. Tel them in their own terms the consequences of adopting the wrong behavior. Set the limits for your child as it will help them to grow into a mature and responsible adult. Establish some house rules.House rules help kids to understand your expectation and develop self control. For instance, no TV until homework is done, no destructive acts with friends or siblings, or no bad words allowed.
If a child does not follow the discipline make sure you warn him/her for first time, followed by small consequences for future mistakes. Most of the time parents fail to follow the rules and ignore the consequences or limits that have been set for kids. Be consistent in teaching as it will discipline your child.
Be an idealist person for your child
Just think how would your child behave or what would he think if you as a parent keep fighting with each other or always get angry in front of your child? Your child absorb and learn quickly by watching their parents acts. You are constantly being watched by your kids so be aware of your actions. If you behave in discipline and remain in sober your child will learn the same. Most of the parents wants to see certain characteristics in their children like friendliness nature, mild, kindness, honesty, faithfulness, and tolerant. Your child will develop all these characteristics only if you portray these in front of your child through your own behavior.
Keep realistic expectations
Most of the time you feel let down by your child's behavior, may be due to your unrealistic expectations. Every child will learn according to his/her ability. You cannot and should not push your child something that you dream off. Many parents expect their child should be learning certain things by this age, or gain certain grades in the school exams, etc. Understand the mental, emotional and physical ability of your child and then set the expectation for yourself. Don't bombard your expectations on your kids. If your child is not good at sports that's fine. he will be good in something else like studies, music, anything. Don't force your child to learn and master the sports only because your friend's son is master in it.
Be flexible in your parenting style
You cannot set rules for parenting. Kids behave differently as their environment changes, so as your parenting style needs to be changed. Sometime the change might work while sometime it might not. So don't feel obsessed with it. As your child goes into teen age his attitude becomes different towards his parents. You might feel as if neglected by your child, but think it as another change in your child's life. Think about your emotional state at that age, take these changes positively and try to find the solution.
Understand your own needs and limitations
Every parents has some weakness in their parenting style, so accept it and move on. None of the parents are perfect. Try to make parenting manageable by recognizing your abilities. Focus on the area that need more attention rather than trying to address everything at once. If you are tired from your own work, take a break, and relax yourself. There is no harm in spending time for yourself. Sometimes you have to sacrifice your happiness for your child but never over do it. Do the things that makes you happy as well.
In conclusion, spending quality time, showing love and respect, regular communication, setting limits and consequences, maintaining discipline, and being flexible are effective steps towards parenting. These are not the rules for parenting but some ways to be an effective parent.
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