Why money cannot buy everything
In an age of sheer commercialism, we are all part of one race -- to make money. We are part of a very big race, where we have no time to pause and think, to answer others, to care for others and so on. We are all simply men and women, out there to make it happen, for us, and our families.
Money can indeed help us to many things. Like buy a very good house, develop a garden, put our children into the costliest schools ( forget for a moment that they may not be the best schools -- most of them are not), can use mineral water, even for bathing, and so on. We can buy the costliest jewels, and have our wives to conduct a good exhibition of those jewels, in all marriages.
We can zip around in the costliest of imported cars and show off to our relatives, that we have "made it".
But have we, really made it? Do not we often feel the emptiness of all this?
Even the richest of men, stop their car in big traffic signals feel very jealous of some man and woman on the street, happily sharing jokes, soaking in the atmosphere, particularly on a September evening. The same time at the traffic signal is often used by wives to remind their husbands on the latest saris that ought to be purchased on that very same evening, and after going around in circles, at five kilometers per hour, to reach the big shopping complex, well, just one kilometer away. True? Try zipping around in the best of cars in Chennai, on all roads that lead to any shopping mall, after 6 PM, to learn how to drive at five kilometers speed, for one hour or more.
Money can indeed open many doors. It can motivate one to be on the toes all the time, it can help one to go abroad on a good holiday and add to the profits of the tour organizer and contribute our might to make other economies that much richer and so on.
But, have we ever thought that money cannot control emotions, bring us back to reality? Do we ever understand that the poor and those who do not have enough resources have better tolerance capabilities, have much better caring and sharing? Do we understand that most of others who are not as lucky as us, do not have commercial considerations in whatever they do, or even prompt others to do?
This is the real tragedy. We fail to understand the limitations of money. Look at realities. You go to the best restaurant, and order the best of dishes. You start eating, and happily so. What happens when you stop eating, and your stomach can not take anything more?
You tend to share some jokes or experiences with your family members. What happens when they simply want you to talk about costly clothes, costly holidays, costly cars and costly bikes? More often than not, your own son would like to just utilize the moment to push his case for the costliest bike in town.
What happens to you? Could you afford to get angry with your son? Chances are your wife will chip in, and say, " after all, he is our child. Get him the bike at any cost".
This is exactly what happens in many rich families where the balance between the commercial and spiritual life is totally not present. In families that rarely visit temples, get to share jokes together, or where the man starts thinking that all he needs to do, is to just "sacrifice' for the family by working for over eighteen hours per day, without a break in some senior executive position, and on Sundays too.
Since the children rarely see the father, whatever time is left out, is spent on asking for the costliest of things. The woman would possibly join all the fun, because luxury would have taught her that money is everything.
So, the poor man who wants to share his achievements at office, or some good appreciation of his boss, does not get any of it, from his family members. His anger or sadness or both gets multiplied when he sort of reminds himself or is reminded by his own wife, that money is so important, to just maintain the kind of lifestyle that they have at the moment.
Looking back, the man would realize that his parents were different. That they shared a lot among themselves, they visited temples, they visited relatives, they took care of the poor, they donated to the poor, they stood by their children in times of stress, and so on. The man starts to get more frustrated when he realizes that people have changed, and he himself has changed.
He has two choices. He could try to infuse some life into his day to day schedule, by making some suggestions to his family members. He could attempt to create some atmosphere where he attempts to behave like his father or mother. If they come visiting, he would be so happy, and try to get them to speak to the children as well.
The second alternative is to simply go back to the commercial ways. He could just do what he is doing, and accept his family members, the way they are.
Most men, particularly highly placed corporate executives, who earn upwards of forty hundred thousand rupees every year, are caught in this muddle of relationships at home -- all commercial, and nothing else.
In urban areas, most men and women are caught up in situations similar to the one described above. Of course, there are cases where the woman is also employed, and this adds to the frustration that there is little time for anything. Sundays are happily spent sleeping.
So, money cannot buy caring and sharing. It cannot buy those precious moments of life, where the men and women, just twenty years ago, stopped to say hello to a neighbor, talked to their friends in office, visited their homes to share a few lighter moments and so on.
Today, we have flats and apartments where the man or the woman would hardly know the names of their neighbors, even on the same floor. Absolutely no effort is made to bond with others. There are no emotions and feelings -- these things are just not part of the game. More so, in gated communities, where the time taken to travel to the city center is too much, and absolutely terrifying, any time, after 5 PM in the evening. The time taken to get back to home after work, is equally frustrating.
So, where do we go from here? Is money making all that bad?
Absolutely not. Money making is good. It helps us to be in tune with the times of runaway inflation. It helps us to just stay where we are, and it often provides us the cushion to lead fairly comfortable lives.
Yet, we need to understand the larger purpose of life. We need to understand that the rat race can simply bring in only commercial relationships, if efforts are not made, very consciously to change habits of children, at a very young age. We also need to understand that "sacrifices' does not mean that we need to work for over eighteen hours per day, every day.
We could and should take time off, to enjoy lighter moments with family members. Get them to open up, and share their own joys and sorrows. Visit temples,visit our own parents if they are not with us, and so on.
Life will acquire a new meaning, if we do so, and we can indeed then think of new possibilities. Merely aping the West, as we often do, and contributing to excessive consumerism, is just not on.
We need to draw the line, rather fast. Let us do it, right now. For, it is now or never.
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