I feel that it is very essential to develop a rapport with your growing children instead of being strict and formal with them.
One of my colleague was telling me about her son who is studying Engineering in his 2nd semester now.Apparently he drinks and smokes and she did not want him to do it in front of them, but was ok with it as long as relatives dont come to know about it and he dint do it at home..I feel this is double standard since her husband drinks and so does she on rare occasions ..She was shocked when I told her to encourage her son to have a drink at home along with his father and also develop a rapport with him.At least they would be able to have a check on him...

Pay no mind to those who talk behind your back, it simply means that you are two steps ahead !!!

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It is difficult to guide children not to do what you do. Personally, I never drink at home and at functions like marriage even though I have no children. So, hardly anyone knows that I drink even occasionally. If some one drinks at residence, he cannot guide his children will not to drink, especially when they grow up.

I feel your advice is okay. When somebody has tradition of drinking at home, grown up children should be allowed drink at home.

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It is difficult to guide children not to do what you do. Personally, I never drink at home and at functions like marriage even though I have no children. So, hardly anyone knows that I drink even occasionally. If some one drinks at residence, he cannot guide his children will not to drink, especially when they grow up.

I feel your advice is okay. When somebody has tradition of drinking at home, grown up children should be allowed drink at home.


Children normally follow their parents and when there is confusion about issues it makes them lose trust and this may lead to clash of ideas, so, it is better to see things in the right perspective before giving advise or lay down rules...

Pay no mind to those who talk behind your back, it simply means that you are two steps ahead !!!

I have a perfect rapport with my only daughter her hubby and my little kiddo. In fact we are like a well organised unit.

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I have a perfect rapport with my only daughter her hubby and my little kiddo. In fact we are like a well organised unit.


Thats great sunil, same here, I and my 3 children are more like friends.They share everything with me and I in turn look up to them on most issues since I find that they are able to advise me or at least talk things out when I am in a spot..

Pay no mind to those who talk behind your back, it simply means that you are two steps ahead !!!

I have a perfect rapport with my only daughter her hubby and my little kiddo. In fact we are like a well organised unit.


Thats great sunil, same here, I and my 3 children are more like friends.They share everything with me and I in turn look up to them on most issues since I find that they are able to advise me or at least talk things out when I am in a spot..


What I feel that children know more than we do in some cases. They are as educated as me and wife and living in more competitive environment.

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It happens with every growing kid but what we must do is to continuously talk to them like a friend and should not be too strict that he/she may not get a space to live. :blink: I have observed it that the parents who are more strict towards their kids, their kids only most of the time do the things which they ask them not to do. :blink: :blink:
It happens with every growing kid but what we must do is to continuously talk to them like a friend and should not be too strict that he/she may not get a space to live. :blink: I have observed it that the parents who are more strict towards their kids, their kids only most of the time do the things which they ask them not to do. :blink: :blink:


Thats exactly what I feel, there is no point in pretending that things dont exist or happen in your household.Our primary concern as parents is to make sure that our children are able to understand their responsibilities towards themselves and the society they live ..

Pay no mind to those who talk behind your back, it simply means that you are two steps ahead !!!

They would feel their responsibility only if they shall be treated at par. They are all equal once they reach a certain mental standard, even minors have their own personality.

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They would feel their responsibility only if they shall be treated at par. They are all equal once they reach a certain mental standard, even minors have their own personality.


Yes and this should be done while they are still young.We have to give them a certain amount of freedom to do what they want , my son at 14 was very particular about working and helping out for a software shop during summer holidays just to know things and he did it and feels that he got a lot of practical experience through it..

Pay no mind to those who talk behind your back, it simply means that you are two steps ahead !!!

My daughter wanted to do it by giving tuition. I allowed her only on one condition that she would teach only maths nothing else. She agreed and succeeded soon.

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