Conflict- An ugly argument
Conflict gets created when two individuals do not agree on something. Disagreement on any matter is a very common thing to take place. But when disagreement takes the form of an argument then it is said that conflict is created. The argument is the end of acceptance. When we argue, we shut down everything inside and create a blockage. This blockage itself will not allow us to understand others point of view. We keep making a statement to convince others that we are right and they are wrong. If other people too do the same thing then within no time disagreements turn into conflict. Having an opinion is right and voicing out that opinion too is okay but when we try to prove others that we are right ones while their opinions are wrong then this disagreeing argument takes shape of conflict.
What causes conflict
Conflict is often heated arguments where there is too much of anger and noise. This is the situation where others opinions do not matter and all that matters is how much we can raise our voice over their voices. Argument or conflict is non-acceptance. Hundreds of questions will be put up and there will always be disagreement. There will be lots of protests and each of the two people who are arguing desire that their opponent just believes what they are saying without protesting. Only our opinions and evidence provided by us will matter at that point of time and others opinions and evidence no matter how strong they may be done not matter at all. We just keep arguing persuasively and while doing so our confidence seems pretty high. We keep emphasizing that our evidence are true and thus this becomes a reason for conflict. We are demanding acceptance from the other person on the same matter and when he opposes us, lots of negativity fills in the whole of the environment. We just do not understand that it is our belief system and as per that we have made up our point of view. It is not at all necessary that others too develop the same point of view as ours. Different people have different belief systems and as per that their conditioning takes place. There is no point if we take it on our ego because then we will be doing more damage to ourselves and the conflict will remain unresolved.
Where there is conflict, there is no solution
We somehow become more authoritative and take up the whole charge whereas there is no need for us to become in charge of anything. This authoritative power which we self-impose on ourselves will make us feel that we have an upper hand and can do whatever we want to. Where there is conflict, there cannot be an agreement. To solve an issue and come to a conclusion, the agreement is essential. Until and unless the conflict is solved, it is very sure that agreement or solution can never be obtained. Conflict is nothing but a state of our mind. It is a state with which we disagree and the decision is almost impossible to obtain.
End the conflict
Conflicts can be ended within a second if even one person shows harmony or else it can run for decades and even centuries. When beliefs, ideas, thoughts, interests clash, conflicts are created. We say that two belief systems are in conflict and it means they are very different from one another. One teaches something and the other one do not support that at all. When people clash i.e., when there is conflict in between them, it becomes almost impossible for them to live together or exist side by side in harmony. The firm opinion of one may conflict with others opinions.
The discussion is the key
Discussion means proper communication. People talk about the matter, keeping their opinions in front of one another. Unlike in case of arguments, people here respect each other's opinions and honor each other's point of views too. They hear their opponents words or opinions and then both parties decide. Since there was no such sort of blockage created, there is no feeling of superiority here. When both the parties keep their opinions in front of each other, most right of both the opinions are selected and the deal is sealed. Decision or agreement can also be reached if the proper discussion is held and if there is no sort of argument or conflict created. This is the reason that it is often said that communication is very healthy.
Argument versus discussion
To resolve an issue or conflict, we need to talk to each other. If there is no sort of communication established then how can a problem that is been existing can be solved. Conflict and disagreement will keep on continuing for ages without coming to a conclusion. If discussion replaces argument then conflict can be solved within a few minutes. The only difference between argument and discussion is that in an argument we feel that we are right and have enough evidence to support our verdict and thus do not even care to listen to our opponent. In the discussion, we present our point of view and support it with evidence, but we have not yet come to a conclusion that we are right and our opponent is wrong. We are open to the possibilities that our opponent might offer a solution better than what we are offering and thus listen to them carefully. When both the parties keep their ears open they will immediately come to a conclusion.
Conflict is ugly
Conflict is an intense fighting period between two people, two groups or even two countries. It is a period where we tend to oppose our opponent as much as possible and carry out every possible task to stop them from succeeding. There is a whole lot of criticization that takes place. All we do is make others feel low by strongly disagreeing with them and criticizing them all the time. All we know is to quarrel with others. A conflict is a kind of battle in which two opponents keep competing with one another to achieve success and control each other. This becomes more like a contest to win where all that matters is to achieve success. When we lose our inner conscious and get low to achieve the success then we may have won the battle, but lost the war. In a conflict, all we do is that we try to hurt each other. Our disagreement will be more like a quarrel and anger will always be present in it.
Conflict is not a contest
Conflict should have to be resolved and it can only be done if we do not indulge in it as if it is a contest. There should not be a question of winning or losing anything. If we need to resolve any conflict with our opponents then the first thing we need to do is to respect them. Once we respect them, we will respect their point of view too. We will soon realize that their thoughts or views are the creation of their belief system. We need to understand that beliefs are too deep. This will make us feel that they are not wrong. When we get clear on this matter, we will soon start hearing them. This is because now we know that they are not wrong in their opinions and thus there is no harm in hearing them out. A blockage that we created deep inside of us will soon get cleared out. Once we listen to them, they too will sense our honesty and efforts that we are putting in and do the same thing. They will allow us to speak and in the same way respect our decisions. Communication will play a key factor here to resolve conflicts.
Conflict does not get created when two people do not agree. It, in fact, gets created when a solution is not met. When communication is established and we start hearing out each other, within no time, we ourselves along with our opponents can come to a very fine conclusion. When discussion replaces arguments to resolve a conflict, ego is lost somewhere. Once ego is shut down by both the parties, decision making becomes easy. We may or may not win the battle, but will not feel bad because we will be in favor of the decision. The decision that is taken and agreement that is made may not benefit us, but we will be happy about it and remain at peace because we will realize that it is best for us and for others. Even if our opponents have one it, we will feel happy because we know they deserved it better than us. Once conflict within our mind is resolved, conflict in outer world does not take much time to get solved.
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