Marriage is confusion- Working or nonworking girl
Working or nonworking
What do you want a wife, homemaker or a companion? This is a common question these days, as the professionals are confused because they are not able to decide whether they want a working girl or a girl who is not in job. The trend is changing among the higher paid category of professionals who are looking for a girl who can spend some quality time with them rather than a working girl who comes to spend night and goes for her job in the morning and some times she goes before any one else if her workplace is far off. Actually, the working couple is better off as far money is concerned but it has converted the homes into lodges where husband and wife come to stay overnight and move to their jobs first thing in the morning.
Lack of understanding
The main problem with working couple comes in form of lack of understanding since they never find enough time to understand each other because they are too busy with their jobs. They earn good money but the relation of a couple never reaches to the height it should reach otherwise. Therefore, guys with good income are thinking in terms of a nonworking wife to make their life better with a loving wife and a house maker as bonus.
That is a fact beyond doubt that working wife cannot be expected to work on two different fronts as effectively because she is an important part of her organization where she has to spend as much time as husband himself. Maybe she spends more time than he does in case she is in a sector where work time is not fixed but according to workload. One cannot expect from a girl who works whole day at her work place to come back home to work at another front with same capacity.
As they say that if some one tries to ride two boats at the same time he is bound to fail. It is same case with a working woman if she is a working woman she may not work effectively at home front and the situation becomes worse when she goes on family ways.
Men do not want to share responsibility
You cannot expect a woman to work at two places at the same time unless you have domestic help for her or you help her yourself in household chore. If you want her to work be prepared to share work. But most of men would not do that saying that this is job of the wife but that was in old times when the jobs were distributed, the men did the outside work and women as house maker including taking care of children. Now if you say that the job of house making is that of a woman then you should not expect her to be a working woman- that is not fair on your part. Why should she work in two shifts that too for no salary in the second one!
People who want working girls for their sons as they bring money and status for them easier way but their dreams come to an end when they find that these girls bring money for them but they do not find the typical ‘Bahu’ that they have always been dreaming off. They always had imagined a girl with a cup of coffee or tea in the morning or setting breakfast table for them. Then not seeing her home most of the time ruins their dreams and they wish that a non working girl had been a better choice.
A working girl
There is a common belief that a working girl would help run the home in a better way as she would earn to fulfill the needs of family members, the status in society would improve and there is nothing wrong if people thought that way. However, they should think in one direction only either money or an ideal old-fashioned bride with covered head in ‘ghunghat’ and obeying every one around because you cannot expect a working girl would oblige you that way. She would have her own work to do and other obligations to keep.
If you look with a practical angle at this all the couple suffered the worst and in case they had any children they suffered as well. The pair had so much to do that they could never afford to pass some quality time together. They supported each other financially but that made them so busy that they never had a few minutes for themselves. Therefore the younger generation is looking for a nonworking girl who can take care of them and their family like good old days when the women were in charge of home affairs and men were responsible for earning part. I do not want to suggest that women should not do any earning for their own satisfaction, they can still do lot many things if they are qualified to do but not on regular basis.
The result
I am in favor of independent women but not, who work like slaves at both fronts and still considered inferior to their male counterparts. This is not fair that women who wish to become self-dependent to get rid of age-old slavery that they have been going through. People have misused them by taking advantage of their education and capacity to work in their own favor. Girls were made to believe that they are independent and earning members but if you ask me they are in worse position today working in double shift without having any time for their own self.
The woman today has found herself in a fix today where she is earning money but has lost every thing else. She has no time for her husband, family members or even her own children who are spending their time either in crèches or with grand parents. Some of the children do not know their mothers because by the time they getup the mothers are gone for work and when the mothers come back the children are asleep. I am sure no woman had asked for such a situation.
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