Main criteria parents seek in son-in-laws

In Indian society, less consideration is given to freedom, preferences, mental health and happiness of female sex. Once daughters are married off, most Indian parents feel that their responsibilities are over. For a low class or an average middle class Indian family where daughters are financially dependent, parents only look for the factors - if son-in-law takes the financial responsibility of the family, and a few parents are concerned about physical abuses. In most cases they will ask their daughters to tolerate as long as 'he looks after the family'. Does it mean an average Indian family expects the money aid from son-in-laws as the prime factor?

Only less families have given importance to factors such as "If our daughter happy with him?", "Does he give her enough freedom to express and desire to do something, go for a job etc?", "Are they compatible?", Mental abuses etc. But when it comes to daughter-in-laws, all the factors quoted above become primary concerns to quote her wrong, while financial responsibility may be partially or fully given to sons. Sons can physically abuse their wives in Indian society while it's a crime in our society if a wife does so.

 

What do you think? What are the facts an average Indian family expects from their son-in-law? What else can they adjust with?

Category: Family & Relationships 3 years ago
Sandhya Rani
Asked 3 years ago

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I don't know in details what my parents had in mind before fixing their daughters' marriage but yes, they were very clear about one thing and that is their sons-in-law must give due respect to their daughters. That desire was fulfilled by their sons-in-law and so they were relaxed souls as they knew their daughters were happy and not humiliated by their husband in any way.  

Shampa Sadhya
Answered 3 years ago
Shampa Sadhya

I have two daughters. And I would love them to marry someone only if they feel like marrying and not for the sake of marriage. I feel this message is not preached to them but I am sure they will imbibe it looking at their parents.

When my husband introduced me to his family, many came to the conclusion that we looked an odd couple as at 5 feet 8 inches, I looked taller than my husband who is also the same height. So even physical and looks compatibility holds a value in match making in our society as the financial security.

Well, As a mother I give the choice to my daughters to marry a person of their choice or our choice only if they want to. However, in my silent prayers I want my son-in-laws to be like my husband---a real man, who knows how to respect woman and take her as equal. 

Arunima Singh
Answered 3 years ago
Arunima Singh

Parents while  marrying their daughter, the important quality they should seek in their son in law is how they treat your daughter. Money, status, name will not give her happiness but a loving heart, supporting hand and an understanding person can do that. 

Sreematrana
Answered 2 years ago
Sreematrana

I have two daughters. Both  my Sons in law are important to me. I always treated them as my sons

rambabu
Answered 2 years ago
rambabu

The main criteria that parents look for is to see if there daughters will be respected and taken good care of.

Sheetal Kumar N
Answered 2 years ago
Sheetal Kumar N

In the Indian context you don't marry a person but marry his whole family, and that's where the problem lies !!! In an ideal situation a boy and a girl should decide for themselves when and if they want to marry and about everything else that concerns their marriage. When everybody around begin to poke their nose , marriage  becomes a case of too many cooks spoiling the broth !

usha manohar
Answered 3 years ago
usha manohar

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