FEAR
I’ve been a corporate trainer for quiet sometime now. Although my experience is not much, I’m pretty well versed with many things that are there in the operational part of training. The reason I like this profession; even though I have no academic background for it is that; we never stop learning.
As a trainer I love to learn something new and then try and pass it on to the batches that are available to me. It was one fine day, couple of months back, that I was given a session on “Positive Attitude”. And doing that program really opened my eyes to a topic which I didn’t even know existed –“FEAR”!
FEAR- It’s the acronym for “FALSE EVIDENCE APPEARING REALITY”. Did you know that? I didn’t even know the word had an expansion!
It made me think, yeah that’s true! It is actually false evidence of things/thoughts/imaginations/facts that appear to be real. Something that I think may be real to me but isn’t really out there. And I started reflecting on the things that made me scared. I came up with a list of things.
My real life example is simple; yet to deal with my fear was so complicated. I remember as a kid I wasn’t that afraid of public speaking but as I grew older I was more conscience about what I said and how people reacted. It was when I said something wrong in class to which everyone laughed, made me scared.
STAGE FEAR was the name, and every time I would stand up in public, my over-creative mind would play in a rather ruthless scene where in I am goofing up and people are pointing mockingly and laughing hysterically at me.
It was just an imagination, but sure was powerful enough to stop me at being my best. I never ever participated in public speaking in my entire school life. In college, I stood up once again for an elocution competition, not that I wanted to but I was compelled to. I was good at writing, but speaking was a different ball game all together. I was forced to enter the competition because each of the other nominees backed out. It was for the “izzat” or respect for the entire class.
Just for the sake of my friends and teachers, I chose to be the martyr to the audience and was prepared for pointed laughs and sarcastic stares. I went up shivering and I started the topic. I remember the topic well- “The best thing you like about life”. And just as I had started this article, I had similarly started my speech then. My nervousness was so obvious that people did giggle, but as I continued the topic and mentioned that the best part of life is that we always learn and even if we make mistakes, we always have a second chance.
It was then, when the whole college stopped and listened, with serious and approving faces. I cited numerous examples from our childhood, like when riding a bike, how many times we fell but it did not deter us from giving up. It was like a challenge, like taking the bulls by the horns and charging in.
Fear then was not an option till our goal was accomplished. Even a baby, when it demands a little toy, he/she would not be able to talk, but are willing to do everything possible to grab your attention-pointing, gurgling, crawling, pulling you and if yet not successful then crying its lungs out till you heed into to its demand.
It’s basic human nature, not to give up. Somehow as we grow up our will to face FEAR is more tiresome than giving into it. We sort of start adapt to living with it rather than getting rid of it .So why don’t we just face it and learn to face the monstrous self created images made within our minds that we claim to be real but are not! And never stop learning.
I was taken aback when I was applauded with the soaring sound of claps. I had not only saved face for my class, I had won the contest, which made me realise that after years of shunning myself from the platform, I had finally given myself the second chance to face my so called FEAR of the stage.
Not only did I face my fear, I realised that since I overcame it, public speaking became my profession. Can you imagine on how much I would have lost on if I had given in to my fear?
It was then it hit me with the correlation between age and fear. Age is directly proportional to the will of nurturing fear. Because the older you get, the more comfortable you are to live with that fear. On the flip side of this statement, the bare truth is, the older you get, the more effort it takes to get rid of fear.
Fear actually, is also contagious. If you see someone else like an elder or loved one fearful of something, you might notice the same fear developed in you. So many times I’ve heard parents tell their children, not to go on stage. Often if a child makes a mistake, they’d be made conscience of how people were laughing or how many times they had practiced and yet failed by their loved ones.
How many more such things are there, that we claim to be real but it’s actually not? The fear to speak or write, the fear to be creative, the fear to think, the fear of the unknown, the fear of death, the fear to apologize, the fear to speak out, the fear to say no or even yes.
I pray that every reader understands that he/she is capable to decide to get rid of the false image. And if you buckle up to merely face any fear, life itself gets altered. Maybe that’s why it’s said; to overcome your FEAR, you just need to take a leap of FAITH.
Sometimes, we need to just acknowledge the fact, that we alone can’t face our fears. True; we need support of friends, family members or social groups. Undoubtedly we need divine support as well. We can get all the external support we want; but we personally have to gear up and be ready to face our fear(s). Positive Attitude does come at a price of a decision.
It’s written in the Bible; in 2 Timothy 1:7: “For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline.”
I am greatful to God that He has created us in His own image. He has made us strong and given us a free will to believe. The question is what do we believe in – “False Evidence” or “Reality”.
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