Let us allow women the space to grow
Though Indian women have progressed to a fairly good degree, there is a huge gap between where they should be, and where they are. We need to understand the different reasons and address them to the maximum extent possible, if there needs to be a significant positive shift. They need a big space to grow and express themselves.
Firstly, in spite of all the education, the exposure to modern ideas, and increasing westernization, particularly in the urban areas, the sad fact of life is the traditional mindset of the average Indian male, who wants the woman -- his wife -- to work, but literally be his slave, at all times. There are TV serials in virtually every single Indian language where this attitude is shown in full flow.
However, where do we start and how do we go about educating the man? It obviously has to start right from the school level. Continuous education of boys can help them to break traditional stereotypes, though if the father continues with the same old behavior at home, the boy is likely to get confused. Normally, good attitudes get formed only after the eighth standard and it is up to the teachers to attempt to distill in the minds of the boys, the need for change. The mothers should not tell their sons about all their ordeals, but instead help them understand that girls are very important in society, and how they will grow up to be affectionate mothers.
There will be a change if there is a constant education.
Secondly, the men should themselves change their behavior in families. It is true that men are now sharing many of the household chores, in families, on a very regular basis. The most important point that should come across to the sons is that their mothers need the space to think, to grow and to express themselves.
The sons will themselves understand what it takes for women like their own mothers, to become successful entrepreneurs, based on what they see in their neighborhood.
However, in all such cases, the husbands would have chipped in with not only money, but also their time and advise, and even technical expertise. This is the most important point that should be told again and again to the sons, so that the sons learn the need for tolerance, love and affection and, most significantly, caring and sharing.
The need for conferences, seminars and debates, at all levels is needed more than ever before. Unless the men also understand what it takes for women to succeed, there will not be a change. The self-help groups, which are very active in Tamil Nadu, is a case in point. Most of these have come about through massive amount of communication, that has happened, even at Government and local village level.
The self help groups can be the ideal starting point for social change of a tall order. The experiences of these groups should be shared with a huge number of other women. Banks and non-banking financial institutions should also chip in, with appropriate loans, so that the movement gathers momentum.
Fourthly, there is an urgent need for the more accomplished, urban-based highly successful women, to come down from their lofty rooftops of success, and understand ground realities in smaller towns and villages. Understanding such realities can prove to be a very effective weapon in their hands, as they can address the needs of women, even on a case to case basis. For example, the women CEOs of banks need to look at the lives of women in villages that surround huge cities like Chennai or Bangalore. If they can encourage them to set up their own small businesses, there is not reason why they would need to shift to the big city for employment.
There is a huge demand, for instance, for setting small eateries in all villages that are connected to the nearest big towns and cities through buses, more particularly, near the bus stands. Since the floating population is huge, women can easily chip in with their cooking skills, and earn a decent amount of money.
There are some skill based training facilities already available, but these should be more comprehensive, and should be able to address the particular skills needed or where the demand is already existing. Basket making skills, for example, is always in demand.
There should be surveys at every level, to identify such training needs and then address them.
Fifthly, women should be allowed to dress they want, and if women want to wear particular dresses on their own, the men should be ready to encourage such things. For example, women often like to wear sleeveless blouses or mini skirts or go to the occasional tea parties of the ladies clubs. It is often seen that such dresses are worn by some friend, and when the woman requests her husband the permission, men deny such things, even if the woman would wear sleeveless blouses only in the ladies club function in the township. The men should change their attitude.
Sixthly, a huge amount of communication between the man and the woman, is now needed than ever before. This is because of the complexities of life, and because of the increased cost of living and its attendant problems.
Most of these problems can be resolved if the man and woman sit together, understand what can be done to do more of caring and sharing and then take every single action to its logical end. This is not such a very complex task, and can be accomplished, if only the husband and wife have the will.
If necessary, the help of the elders in the family can be taken. This is because they are the seasoned players in the game of life, and have gone through far more difficult times, than what the present generation in their twenties and thirties are going through.
So, a combination of each of the aforesaid steps can indeed help the Indian woman to express herself, and will indeed help her get the vital space to grow. It is not that this is a choice. It is a big imperative, as women have a big role in India's economic and social development.
Like it on Facebook, Tweet it or share this article on other bookmarking websites.