An important cause of family break up is that institution of marriage is no longer concerned as important as a few years back. In the past, nobody would even think of breakup of marriage. Now married life is not considered so pious. Women in the past were financially more dependant on their husbands. They reconciled to their fate as junior family member. They would gladly and necessarily accept dominanceoftheir husbands. Now wives also earn and are as educated as men. They are often very proudy also. The ego of husband and wife both leads to breeak up.
Undoubtedly, women are men's equal. But men as well as women have social responsibility. A little patience will help. When husband as well as wife adjust with others at work place, there is no reason why thay cannot do at home. They should considerthat even after divorce there is no guarantee that new spouse will be better than the present one.
G. K. Ajmani Tax consultant http://gkajmani-mystraythoughts.blogspot.com/
This is my second post regarding the discussion and in this post I am going to discuss some off-beat though important reasons for family break-ups apart from the husband wife relationship which I mentioned in my first post...
Causes or Reasons:
1) Financial Problem - One of the main causes of breaking up of Indian families is related with money and if for any reason the inflow of money decreases different kinds of family problems seem to surface in the ugly form of blaming each other for the position of the family and this in turn results in the bitterness of relations among family members and overall an atmosphere of hate and anger is created.
2) Culture of joint family - Joint families consists of husband, wife, children and husband's parents. Here differences and dissatisfaction among members is a very common phenomenon and thus an atmosphere of jealously, attitude problems and conflicts crops up resulting in breaking up of joint families and forming nuclear families. Besides, members in joint families have their own individual ideas and plans which becomes a matter of worry and awe for other members in the family.
3) Lack of patience and forgiveness - During this modern age, when husbands and wives have their own careers and earn for a living it becomes hard for them to keep a level head and within seconds matters become worse for them followed by heated conversations for even on a trifle matter due to lack of patience and forgiveness and this in the long term has its own effect in the smooth running of a family.
4) Discussing marital affairs - Yes, discussing marital affairs either by the husband with their parents or by the wife with her parents creates enough mistrust and lack of faith among the partners and things begins to widen with time and finally if this is not timely checked and controlled by the spouses the end result is divorce or family breakup.
5) Conflict among family members - Often conflict between family members arises where too many family members living and sharing the same roof. Quarrels relating to paternal property, quarrels relating to share in the property and some time the division of the same building among the brothers result in separation of families.
* Being a prudent family man your idea should be to analyse and identify the family problems and deal with those before they get out of your control and matters become worse. Your role play as a member of a family is important in this regard.
* Try to do activities together including each member of the family. I simply don't mean that you need to move out with them to movies and amusement parks and thereby spend a huge sum of money but simple things like having the dinner together at night does a lot in building a foundation of a good family spirit.
* Always do things that are good for the whole family rather than only thinking your own selfish benefits and letting the other members to suffer from pain and agony which they might face in their day to day lives.
* Control your anger and try to find a solution to family disputes in a cool manner by clearing your doubts through discussions and communications with other fellow members in the family.
* Give time to your near and dear ones including your wife, children, your ageing parents and brothers and sisters. When you give them your time and concentration equally on every member it surely helps in building a good bond and zeal among the family members....
Guys this is my second post and please stay tuned for my upcoming and final post which will be dealing with some more causes of family breakups which we see in our day to day lives and the remedy for the same!!!
At the risk of instigating a riot of sorts, the general opinion in this discussion seems very men oriented.
Let me be very clear here, I am not saying that women are the saints in every situation. I have no doubt that they play as much a role as the man in a breakup (it takes two to tango after all!) But just to make this discussion more active...
Why is it that the general opinion is that the family breaks up because the wife can't adjust with the husband's family?
Come on guys the family breaks up is not mainly because of the ladies alone. It is mainly due to misunderstanding and a lack of patience which leads to these kinds of stuffs. First of all the elderly people must think that the person who has joined the family is also a human being and not a slave and treat them like a human being. If you find any wrong in their attitude talk to them in person and make them understand the values of the other members and what they expect.
Why are the new wives always responsible!? Don't you think the husband has some responsibility in the matter? Considering that the wife has left everything familiar and has come to a completely new environment, the least the husband can do is to help her adjust. In fact, you could even argue that the husband is responsible for the discord and eventual break up (if that is the case) because he didn't care enough to take the time to help his wife and other family members adjust to each other.
Two factors which are mostly responsible for break up in families are 1) lack of time to devote between the members (2) lack of understanding between same. Due to hectic activity one doesn't find himself to give some time to other member in the family which results in lack of understanding between the both and finally results in break up. Another important reason could be hiding of facts from each other. This happens in most cases that members usually try to hide facts from other and when the other member comes to knew about the same, it ends in family break up.
Devote enough time for other members.
Try to understand the feelings of other members.
Without knowing the facts and figures, do not come to conclusion.
Try to love members as much as you love yourself.
Today also I heard a family break up case of one of my collegue.Reason is simple.She is not coming back.Why? No answer!!!
What shows this friends???
You've only heard the husband's side of the story. The wife might have some very valid reasons for why she feels she can't return. As a person on the outside looking in, who are we to pass judgment on her actions without knowing the whole situation.
Now-a-days there are a lot of operating system available and people choose according to their requirement among the wide range of operating systems. so the question is which one particularly you will pick for yourself?